Title: Rule Number 8
Author:
seren_ccd
Fandom: Thor/The Avengers
Pairing/Characters: Darcy Lewis/Clint Barton established
Rating: M for language
Word Count: 365
Spoilers: For Thor.
Disclaimer: Not mine!
A/N: So, as you may know, Jeremy Renner went on Jimmy Kimmel and this happened.
fringedweller then prompted me with: Clint/Darcy, Tony thought it would be hysterical. As her most faithful minion, I had to write it and then she told me to re-post. So. Yeah. I'm totally not sorry.
Summary: That was definitely not a sleeping pill.
Darcy bit her lip, trying to hold in the snickers.
"It's not funny," Clint said red-faced, his hands clenching the armrests tightly.
"Oh, it's a little funny," Darcy said. "Actually, it's more than a little funny. It's verging on freakin' hysterical."
"Traitor," he said glaring up at the ceiling of the private plane chartered by SHIELD to get them back to headquarters. "Son of a bitch said it would help me sleep."
"Dude," Darcy said. "This is totally your own fault. You know you know better than to take anything Tony gives you. That's like, in the first paragraph of the SHIELD handbook. Rule Number Five: Never accept anything Tony Stark gives you unless it has been tested first."
Clint just whimpered, clearly too...tense to see reason, Darcy thought. So she continued. "Besides, this is him getting even for the whole arrow holes in the upholstery of his Jag thing."
"Baby, you really aren't helping," he said shaking his head, beads of sweat appearing at his temples.
Darcy started to smile. She leaned over and said lowly, "And what would you like me to do that would help you?"
"Oh, fuck, Darcy," he said squeezing his eyes shut. "Don't you fucking dare tease me."
"Who's teasing?" she said next to his ear. "There's no one around and we can always say that it was the drugs that made us do it and that it was Tony's fault that we just had to have sex the entire flight back. Rule Number Eight: It's ALWAYS Tony Stark's fault."
Clint opened his eyes and Darcy felt a little bad for teasing when she saw the strain in his face. "You mean it? You will let me fuck you into next week on a SHIELD chartered private plane because Tony Stark slipped me Viagra?"
"Well, when you put it like that," Darcy said. She tilted her head in thought, and then nodded. "Yes. Absolutely. Take me now, Barton."
"Thank fucking Christ."
Author:
Fandom: Thor/The Avengers
Pairing/Characters: Darcy Lewis/Clint Barton established
Rating: M for language
Word Count: 365
Spoilers: For Thor.
Disclaimer: Not mine!
A/N: So, as you may know, Jeremy Renner went on Jimmy Kimmel and this happened.
Summary: That was definitely not a sleeping pill.
Darcy bit her lip, trying to hold in the snickers.
"It's not funny," Clint said red-faced, his hands clenching the armrests tightly.
"Oh, it's a little funny," Darcy said. "Actually, it's more than a little funny. It's verging on freakin' hysterical."
"Traitor," he said glaring up at the ceiling of the private plane chartered by SHIELD to get them back to headquarters. "Son of a bitch said it would help me sleep."
"Dude," Darcy said. "This is totally your own fault. You know you know better than to take anything Tony gives you. That's like, in the first paragraph of the SHIELD handbook. Rule Number Five: Never accept anything Tony Stark gives you unless it has been tested first."
Clint just whimpered, clearly too...tense to see reason, Darcy thought. So she continued. "Besides, this is him getting even for the whole arrow holes in the upholstery of his Jag thing."
"Baby, you really aren't helping," he said shaking his head, beads of sweat appearing at his temples.
Darcy started to smile. She leaned over and said lowly, "And what would you like me to do that would help you?"
"Oh, fuck, Darcy," he said squeezing his eyes shut. "Don't you fucking dare tease me."
"Who's teasing?" she said next to his ear. "There's no one around and we can always say that it was the drugs that made us do it and that it was Tony's fault that we just had to have sex the entire flight back. Rule Number Eight: It's ALWAYS Tony Stark's fault."
Clint opened his eyes and Darcy felt a little bad for teasing when she saw the strain in his face. "You mean it? You will let me fuck you into next week on a SHIELD chartered private plane because Tony Stark slipped me Viagra?"
"Well, when you put it like that," Darcy said. She tilted her head in thought, and then nodded. "Yes. Absolutely. Take me now, Barton."
"Thank fucking Christ."
Entirely off topic, but I had to share....
Date: 2012-07-27 05:39 pm (UTC)http://www.buzzfeed.com/catesish/superhero-squirrels
http://www.buzzfeed.com/whitneyjefferson/dc-and-marvel-superheroes-as-manatees
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Date: 2012-07-27 07:05 pm (UTC)Pretty sure the part from "because" to the end isn't even necessary. ;)
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Date: 2012-07-29 04:06 pm (UTC)Unless he's impotent (and there is nothing in canon to suggest this is the case), Clint was sexually aroused because he finds Darcy sexually attractive, not because he took the Viagra. As a scientist, Tony would know this, even if Clint and Darcy didn't. The facts work for your story better than they do for Renner's, imho.
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Date: 2012-07-30 07:49 pm (UTC)I'm sure there was a good reason for the arrow holes in the jag.
this is an enjoyable read. kudos!
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Date: 2012-07-30 07:53 pm (UTC)though Batmanatee looks like he's a senior citizen. (and Wonder Womanatee's not sufficiently covering her armpits - where did you think manatees had theirs?)
awesome.
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Date: 2012-08-01 05:25 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-10-20 05:04 pm (UTC)Clint/Darcy is my new addiction (and it was all
So this made me smile
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Date: 2012-10-20 06:13 pm (UTC)Clint/Darcy came out of NO where and I just adore them.